Manolo for the Men

In case you needed any evidence that tuxes, like most jackets, look far better when buttoned.

It’s one thing to be short, another to be skinny. But when the two are combined, as in the case of Elijah Wood, a painted-on “tux” with overly long trousers only makes things worse.

As the replacement for the Freddie Mercury, lead singer of the rock band Queen, Paul Rogers has had to bear a heavy cross. Why he chose trousers that visually depict this, Izzy will never know.

According to The New York Times, young designers like Marc Jacobs, Thom Browne, Scott Sternberg of Band of Outsiders, Alexander McQueen, and Michael Bastian are offering stylish versions of the short-sleeved dress shirt this summer.

The article rightly points out that this look will work, if at all, only on men who’ve spent a lot of time at gym. It fails to note, however, that the short-sleeve dress shirt is the only element of men’s businesswear that derives from women’s clothing. Izzy believes that that should be all you need to know when deciding whether to don one.

Presumably both before and after getting this haircut this World Cup fan was kicked in the head.

First he wore this. And now here is how Ralph Lauren (né Lipshitz) recently showed up to a black-tie event. Is that the same turquoise (?) on his jeans as on his earlier giant belt?

Dear readers, Izzy believes we must stage an intervention.

Some novelty cufflinks for the World Cup fan.

A power tie for the paterfamilias.

Or one for the dandy in the family.

Yesterday the Today show featured a segment on clothing advice for short men. The advice, most of which was fine, was delivered by Alan Au of Jimmy Au’s, one of only ten stores in the U.S. that cater to men under 5′8″ tall, even though one-third of the male population falls into that category. Izzy must admit that he did not even know that such stores existed. By contrast, there are about 1,000 stores for big and tall men.

To any entrepreneurs out there, there is a huge, er, small market out there waiting to be tapped.

Norman Foster, architect of the new Hearst Building in New York, proves himself dapper in a fitted cotton suit with very high lapels and hacked (i.e., angled) pockets, a bold checked shirt with an unusual button-down collar, and an asymmetric tie.

Whereas Richard Meier, most famous for his Getty Center in Los Angeles, opts to pop his heads out of a giant brown paper bag.

Over at Whirled Events, a World’s Ugliest Tie Competition is taking place in honor of Father’s Day, which is quickly approaching. With so many atrocities out there, Izzy prefers the challenge of submitting an entry from a legitimate fashion house. Lord knows what the fashionistas at Etro were thinking when they cut this…

Izzy finds it particularly odd that in place of a coal, carrot, or even biscotti nose, the snowman has just a squiggle. At least the white polka dots could pass for snowflakes.

Not to be outdone by Ralph Lauren’s bad example, Kenneth Cole here combines a soggy collar, gobs of hair mousse, and a tie knot far too tiny for his Frankensteinian head. He would appear to have chosen his wife well, however.

Merchant prince Ralph Lauren here helpfully teaches us three lessons: 1) Black and brown tend to clash, 2) Men of a certain age ought to avoid leather trousers, 3) Texas-sized belt buckles do not belong on a Lichtenstein-sized man.