It’s not often that Izzy feels unworthy of a pair of pants, but these trousers from Bonobos are infinitely hipper than its new owner. Made of shockingly lightweight corduroy, with wales the width of a needle, the soft pants are accented with pink contrast stitching and mod-ish linings that peek out from the rear pockets. Your tush had better be prepared for all of the attention.
As much as Izzy hates wearing name tags at conferences and the like (the tags, a dorky accessory, inevitably ruin your look), he would sooner tattoo “Izzy” on his forehead than wear a tie embroidered with his name.
Like a colorblind Medusa, Clint Eastwood, in his blue shirt and black tuxedo, bruises the eyes of anyone who looks in his direction. Even worse, his “formal” wear includes a bent collar.
With his bangs, patchy goatee, and ill-fitting disco-era suit (note the shirt peeking under the vest, the pants pooling at the ankles, and the wrinkles in the trousers’ crotch), has Brad Pitt ever looked worse? Tom Cruise couldn’t get away with this look either.
Hong Kong Disneyland recently unveiled Chinese New Year costumes designed by Vivienne Tam. She chose to put Mickey into a cherry-red Mao suit, the military-influenced tunic suit that was popularized by Communist dictator Mao Zedong. (According to Wikipedia, the suit was originally designed to cater to Western sensibilities yet still remain Chinese. For example, instead of the three hidden pockets of Western suits, the suit was designed with four outside pockets to adhere to Chinese concepts of balance and symmetry.)
Witnessing this jarring combination of Mickey and Mao, Izzy looks ahead to the day when Disneyland Havana sells t-shirts printed with this version of silk-screen Che.
Until that time comes, you can buy the shirt at Bureaucrash, purveyor to militant capitalists everywhere.
The quirky design firm of SoloUniko has invented a scarf with a button to hold it in place. It’s a neat idea, but ordinarily it’s not too difficult to tie a scarf securely. Then again, why take a chance of ending up like Isadora Duncan?
