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Clothing the Extra-Tall Man

Amare Stoudemire and Anna Wintour

Here’s a scene from last fall’s Fashion Night Out, Vouge editor Anna Wintour with the New York Knick’s Amar’e Stoudemire, who is widely considered the best dressed man in the National Basketball Association.

Finding clothes that fit Stoudemire’s 6’11″ frame is not easy. In fact, I have a young nephew, 16 years old, who’s just north of 6’8″ and is still growing. His mother is beside herself trying to locate reasonably priced clothes, knowing that he may outgrow them in six months. (Do you have any idea how hard it is to find 38″ leg jeans?)

Obviously, Stoudemire, who was paid more than $18 million dollars last year, can not only afford to do top notch custom tailoring, but even better, many top menswear designers, like Gucci and Tommy Hilfiger, are lining up to dress him.

Amare Stoudemire in Calvin Klein Tuxedo

For example, here he is in a Calvin Klein tuxedo, which given his size undoubtedly cannot be purchased off the rack. What Stoudemire proves, however, is that with a little effort, a little cash, and a willingness to experiment, the big and tall man can can kit himself out in grand style.

Costello & Tagliapietra: Among The Most Stylish New Yorkers!

Jeffrey Costello & Robert Tagliapietra

Jeffrey Costello & Robert Tagliapietra, Stylish Bears

Manolo says, finally, there is hope for ordinary American men!

While their clothes they design for others are beautiful, no one would accuse the fashion designers Robert Tagliapietra and Jeffrey Costello of being anything other than burly gay bears, but they are good enough

But, perhaps if you were the burly, big-bellied straight man who wished to claim the mantle of stylishness, you could do worse than emulate these two.

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Not a Girly Boy

manly male model

Having bemoaned the plague of less-than-masculine male models, Izzy is not quite willing to praise this rare example of the opposite extreme: a hairy, meaty chav with teeth that only an orthodontist could love—all courtesy of punk fashionist Vivienne Westwood.  Izzy hasn’t seen this much bling since Hans Holbein the Younger.

Unwinnable Arms Race

world’s tallest man

If you’re the world’s tallest man and lack the world’s largest wallet, no one expects your suits to fit well. But why, of all people, should your sleeves be too long?! And don’t say you’ll grow into it.

Turning Siamese

Thom Browne siamese pants

Courtesy of Thom Browne comes this freakish nightmare—of ironing, that is.

Roughneck

lawyer in ascot

A Milwaukee-area judge has gotten hot under the collar due to a prosecutor’s wearing an ascot in lieu of a court-mandated necktie.  While the judge might be extreme in threatening the lawyer with contempt, his Honor is correct that an ascot must be seen as an informal piece of clothing.   While donning one in court might not amount to a full-blown violation of the canons of legal ethics, the real question is why the prosecutor would want to accentuate the girth of his already hefty neck.   His goatee was a smart choice, however.

Advertisement for Myself

Never a fan of false humility, Izzy is proud to report that he was recently quoted in a Denver Post article about Nordstrom, the department store famed for its customer service.  Alas, although Izzy gave good quote, the reporter chose to go with the relatively humdrum.  Still, the article is worth reading.  Izzy would add to it that Nordstrom has one of the best men’s shoe departments in the business, with a wide variety of high quality brands, and the store also carries an extensive selection of clothing sizes, which makes it a good choice for the big, small, or unusually-sized gentleman.  It’s reputation for superior service is well-deserved, but while many people know of its generous return-policy (e.g., purchases can be returned without receipts as long as Nordstrom carries the items), its low-price guarantee also deserves a huzzah.

Kilt Tough

UtilikiltWorkman's Utilikilt

Far from being a traditional Scottish kilt, the Utilikilt is a proud representative of the “men’s unbifurcated garment” a/k/a the manskirt. Offered in eight styles, in materials including cotton, leather, duck cloth, and lightweight nylon, it aims to be a manly, well-ventilated alternative to the tyranny of trousers. It’s also great for anyone looking to pick a fight.  Obviously only for the brave, the garment is best attempted by big, burly men.

Hey, Hey, LBJ, How Many Pants Did You Buy Today?

LBJ on the phone

It may pale in political importance next to the tapes of President Nixon’s phone calls, but this surreal 1964 recording of LBJ ordering custom trousers from Joe Haggar still deserves a place in the history books. Be warned: the salty Texan’s choice of words—and colors—is of questionable taste.

Call Me “Izzy Ailed”

Izzy feels remiss for having offended some of his loyal readers regarding Gianfranco Ferre.  The post was intended to make fun of the designer’s fondness for white suits—not his size and certainly not his passing.  (As someone who has actually read Moby-Dick (twice!), Izzy feels confident that while being compared to a whale can be unflattering, the allusion to the Great White Metaphor has many positive connotations.)

As a matter of fact, Izzy admired Ferre for being someone in the weight-obsessed fashion world who demonstrated a (stereotypically Italian?) willingness to take pleasure in food.  Come to think of it:  Could the widespread abuse of intoxicants in that industry be  an attempt to compensate for self-denial?

In any case, Izzy apologizes for teetering over the “Cartesian vortices” below.

 

Leviathan

Gianfranco Ferre in white

Gianfranco Ferre, the Italian “Architect of Fashion,” has died. Captain Ahab must have finally caught up with him.

Lost Pounds

Jorge Garcia in formal wear

Jorge Garcia, one of the stars of the TV show Lost, clearly has a lot of food experience under his belt. But by wearing a well-fitting tuxedo—and keeping it buttoned—he looks like he’s been forced to forage on a desert island.

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